Distractions in Marriage

Distraction: a thing that prevents someone from giving full attention to something else.

We all have had moments where we are trying to focus on one thing and something or someone else takes our attention away. It can be aggravating when we are trying to focus but keep getting distracted by something else. There are many things that cause you to lose focus on what should have your attention, like your phone, friends, family, hobbies, memberships into organizations, kid’s activities, etc. We must recognize when something or someone is a distraction; not everything is bad but it can distract you from what God would have you to do.

In marriage, there are many things that can cause you to become distracted and not give your husband or wife your full attention. Feelings are often distractions in relationships. Your spouse may have done something you didn’t like, or hurt your feelings or even disregarded you; but when you focus on how their actions made you feel, you become distracted and take your attention off what is important, which is your marriage. It’s okay to acknowledge how you feel but you can’t focus on that feeling alone. Focusing on your feelings alone can cause you to respond or react in a way that would hurt your marriage instead of helping. Activities can also be a distraction in your marriage. If you are always focusing on your time at the gym, attending every organization’s meetings, having your kids involved in every activity offered; it will take time away from your spouse. You will be so busy (distracted), your marriage will suffer because you aren’t focusing on your marriage or your spouse.

You also must remember; the enemy is out to destroy your marriage so he will use things or people as distractions to get your focus from your marriage. It can be a promotion at work which can cause you to have a bigger work load; which could lead to longer hours at work or more work to do at home. A promotion is great but if it causes you to lose valuable time with your spouse, is it worth it? It can come in the form of a new friend; this friend may not be married or have kids, so they may not understand the importance of putting your marriage first. The enemy can use a family member who may not like your spouse or may be jealous of your marriage, who talks negatively about your spouse or about marriage. These people or things aren’t necessarily “bad” but they can prevent you from giving your marriage your full attention. That’s why it’s so important to have a real relationship with God so you will know when an activity, promotion, relationship, etc. is a distraction.

Focus: God first; spouse second; kids third; family, friends and everything else last. If we can remember that, it will help your focus to remain on what is most important. God would not have you to put other people and activities above your spouse.

Be blessed…love y’all for real!

Chell